The Hangover Quotes
The Hangover was a huge hit and along with huge hit comedies comes lots of quotes. We have compiled a list of the 10 funniest and most memorable quotes from the movie “The Hangover”. If you feel we have missed one of the best quotes, please feel free to add it in the comments. Happy Quoting and check out other movie quotes :)
Top 10 Funniest and Most Memorable Quotes from The Hangover
- Phil Wenneck: Tracy, it’s Phil.
Tracy Garner: Phil, where the hell are you guys?
Phil Wenneck: We lost Doug.
Tracy Garner: What? We’re getting married in five hours.
Phil Wenneck: Yeah… that’s not gonna happen. - Alan Garner: Who’s baby is that?
Phil Wenneck: We’ll deal with the baby later.
Stu Price: We’re not gonna leave a baby in the room. There’s a tiger in the bathroom! - Alan Garner: [while picking up a friend at the school where he works] Did you have to park this close?
Doug Billings: Yeah, why?
Alan Garner: I just… I can’t be here.
Doug Billings: What do you mean?
Alan Garner: I’m not supposed to be within two hundred feet of a school… or a Chuckie Cheese. - Mr. Chow: See you later gay boys!
- Phil Wenneck: [his answering machine message] It’s Phil, leave a message. Actually you know what don’t text me. It’s gay.
- Stu Price: Oh my God, I can’t believe I gave away my grandmother’s Holocaust ring to a complete stranger.
Alan Garner: Yeah, I didn’t even know they gave out rings during the Holocaust. - Phil Wenneck: Would you please put some pants on? I feel weird having to ask you twice.
- Stu Price: You do know counting cards is illegal, right?
Alan Garner: It’s not illegal, it’s just frowned upon. Like masturbating in an airplane.
Phil Wenneck: I’m pretty sure that’s illegal, too. - Stu Price: They’re really a lot more mature than you think.
Phil Wenneck: [yelling from outside] Paging Doctor Faggot! Paging Doctor Faggot!
Melissa: You should probably go, Doctor Faggot. - Mr. Chow: To-da-loo, motherfucka!
Related posts:
Old Man at Gas Station: “That’s a sweet ride.”
Alan: “Yeah…don’t touch it. Don’t even look at it. Don’t even look at me. Just go. I don’t care, I’ll hit an old man in public.”
Why is the “Dr. Faggot” joke one of the funnitest? Is it okay to make “n_gger” jokes now, too?
Note: couldn’t find a meter, but here’s four dollars
i cant find the EXACT WORDS THOUGH
Adam said.. Why is the “Dr. Faggot” joke one of the funnitest? Is it okay to make “n_gger” jokes now, too?
it was a movie.. its not that serious..
THANK U MSJONES!! GET A LIFE ADAM ITS A MOVIE!! U FAGGOT!!
Adam, I completely agree with you. If the movie were to say
“paging doctor n*gger”
or
“paging doctor cracker”
the whole audience would be in an uproar. But since homosexuals are treated as second class citizens in this country, its alright to say faggot.
To ADAM and HAYS, what they said is not illegal, its just frowned upon, so why dont yal just shut the hell up, its a damn movie
To ADAM and HAYS
wow some people get butt hurt over a whole lotta nothing…..it was a movie and that part was funny so quit crying…..grow up and don’t be so sensitive….if your gay embrace it and be able to laugh at that stuff i don’t cry when i hear a blonde joke.. I LAUGH!
ps- if you don’t like being treated as so called “second class” citizens in “this country” then i guess you shouldn’t be a homo or you should move to a different country
Ok, everyone is missing the point here. The joke isn’t funny because he said the f-word. The joke is funny because the dude is trying to convince his wife how mature his friends are, and clearly they are not.
And yes, I do agree homosexuals are most definitely missing rights in this country, but as far as this movie and that joke, I think people are taking it the wrong way. Just look how many times the n-word was used in Pulp Fiction. I didn’t hear you guys getting all pissed about that.
Adam, I completely agree with you. If the movie were to say
“paging doctor n*gger”
or
“paging doctor cracker”
the whole audience would be in an uproar. But since homosexuals are treated as second class citizens in this country, its alright to say faggot
what fucking white guy in the WORLD, would get pissed off at them saying “Paging Dr Cracker”???????????,We know how to take the joke, every white guy would have laughed their ass off, and went on about their day! But you people have to find SOMETHING to get pissed off at, or something that you can claim to be Politically Incorrect! GET A FUCKING LIFE!
Hey! There’s Skittles In There!
Just FYI Alan says he is not supposed to be within 200 ft of a school or a chuckie cheese. Not a church or chuckie cheese
thanks for the catch schillz, i have updated the quote.
here we are, a pack of wolves in the desert, looking for strippers and cocaine
every body just shut up cuz if it said
paging doctor n*gger or cracker
i think everyone would laugh and nobody be mad but why would they call him n8gger or cracker thats not as funny as calling someone a faggot lol
Damn just shut up okay?? idk of one white person getting offended by cracker. but if your black or gay embrace the hell outta it. Don’t get offened be like hell yeah i’m gay or hell yeah i’m black lol
:)
How can they leave out the end of #8 where Alan talks about terrorists causing masturbation to be illegal on planes its what made that part funny
Phil: What if Tigers dont like pepper?
Alan: Tigers like pepper, they dont like Cinnoman
ok these comments are kinda ummm Idk anyway yes like kelley says be happy for what you are if your gay ur gay be proud of it its not like Jennifer Lopez is embarressed of here badunkadunk embarce it haha
Dude,
Shut the fuck up!! why the hell is everyone so sensitive.. its a fucking movie! u liberal asshole go get a fucking life! what other subjects do you have that u would like to impose your liberal views upon? Most of you assholes have never even been outside your fucking neighborhood… go live in a different country and see if you have any fucking rights!
Adam,
Its funny in the context of the movie. Because he is trying to tell his girlfriend his friends are mature and then they yell that. Which, is their point, is immature. See? Its funny cuz they yell it after he says they are mature.
Its not just cuz its a movie. people are rude.
chill, just give him a watermelon and some frid chicken and he’ll drop the whole issue
Are you all going to make a big thing about where Mr. Chow says – no its funny because he is fat. Hello I am fat and I laugh hard at fat jokes. There funny!!!! It was a funny part of the movie when he laughs and says…he’s fat. I agree about the timing of the movie….it was the funny part of it. They are mature and you need to get to know them and then the whole paging DR. fagot. Timing…..it is everything and it was funny. Now drop it. It’s not a man purse its a satchel – Indiana Jones wears one. he he he
I’m gay and I thought “paging dr. faggot” was one of the best parts! It is a movie…the part was about how mature his friends were…hello? Can we get with it here??
adam and hays are gay
Mr. Chow was funny. Nothing more funny than a little gay Chinaman who can beat the s**t out of you and talks funny.
Gay people in this blog….
Alan: I find your language very offensive.
LMAO!
Educational Point to Ponder – Historical Reference:
Faggots – small sticks used to start fires to burn homosexuals at the stake in the 1500′s around the same time as the Salem Witch Trials. Today we use the term kindling. In the 1950′s and 1960′s the term “fag” was used for a smoke, a reference back to the 1500′s.
wow all this talk on the one quote about dr. faggot and you all missed a GREAT movie quote…..
What happens in Vegas, Stays in vegas…. except for herpes that shit’ll come home with you
not one board with out racisim one the entire ‘net man were sad as a people i see why we need fuuny ass movies. stu- “thats him that our friend doug” tyson flunkie- “I don’t give a fuck”. purecomadey
hahahahahaha i cant stop laughin
seriously adam shut up! if u are gay as u say so.. then it shouldnt bother u unless ur not sure u are..
watever… yea i agree im half white and half mexican
i dont get offended if they call me craker nor beaner
i just laugh!so shut the fuck up :)
and if u dont like it then dont watch the movie again!!!
now here some quotes i loved
Stu Price: Alan, are you sure you didn’t see anyone else in the suite?
Alan Garner: Yeah, I checked all the rooms… no one’s there. Check its collar or something.
alan: NOT AT THE TABLE CARLOS :)
Alan Garner: It would be so cool if I could breast-feed.
phils face there was so funny!!!
Mr. Chow: You gonna fuck on me?
Alan Garner: Nobody’s gonna fuck on you! I’m on your side! I hate Godzilla! I hate him too! I hate him! He destroys cities! *Please*! This isn’t your fault. I’ll get you some pants.
omg!! u nail the baby!!
.. are my glasses ok?
ur glasses are fine u dick
Stu Price: You are literally too stupid to insult.
the best part… Alan Garner: Hey you guys ready to let the dogs out? ..
phil: who brought this guy..
NOT U FAT JESUS
omgg i cant stop laughin at the lil fat boy who take the picture with his phone and alan kicked hahahaha
and i love stus song..
What do tigers dream of when they take their little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras, or Halle Berry in her Catwoman suit? Don’t you worry your pretty striped head, we’re gonna get you back to Tyson and your cozy tiger bed. And then we’re gonna find our best friend Doug, and then we’re gonna give him a best friend hug. Doug, Doug, oh, Doug, Dougie, Dougie, Doug, Doug! But if he’s been murdered by crystal meth tweakers, well then we’re shit out of luck.
To All of you who got offended by “paging Dr. Faggot” all i have to say is “Later GAYBOYS”
hahaha wow to all the people who cant take a joke!!! i loved this movie and i think it was the best fuckin movie ever made!!! and i have to say my favorite part of the movie would be
” too-da-loo motherfuckaaaaass!!!!! ” hahahahahahahahahaha best part also i loved the part when alan hit carlos in the head with the door and was like are my glasses okay?? haha and. . .
“NOT YOU FAT JESUS!!”
Loved the review you have written here. Is there anything else to say on this subject?
Keep up the interesting posts. I love to see keen bloggers!
I would have laughed my ass off if a black guy would have said “paging dr. cracker”……or as chris rock says, crackuh ass crackuh!!!! people need to loosen the f)(*k up.
I think it is so stupid to turn all gay rights in a comedy movie forum, if you take everything that serious you will probably have a stroke by the time you are 35, or get beat up by some insensitive Straightie…lol or whatever you queers call us. Dont get so butt hurt, enjoy the movie.
Anyway, cant figure out my fav, but I like
Stew: Are you sure you’re even qualified to take care of a baby?
Alan: What I’ve found a baby before!
Stew: You Found a baby, Where?
Alan: The Coffee Bean
Ok. The whole Docter Faggot/Docter Nigger thing. No one would really care about wat it said whether it was Doctor Faggot, Nigger or Cracker. Its a fucken movie no one would be offended. God Damn. You guys are way too sensitive. haha its fucking hilarious looking at your guys convo. haha
the dr. faggot dr. nigger thing not a big deal some people are dumb as alan from the movie. If the movie were to say paging dr. nigger, the audience would laugh because they realize that its meant to be funny. When you decide to be a faggot you should think about how much crap you’d be taking like this for example.
oh yeah and come to think about it; it does have a racial comment toward the end when they say not our doug, black doug. and you see nobody said anything about it so stop making such a big deal about it. how about you make a movie and joke on straight people and see how many poeple would have a problem about it. NONE
Oh yeah and i freakin loved the song stu sang “well then we’re shit outta luck”. hahah
“You are litterally too stupid to insult”. hahahaha that was hilarious
Okay Adam. They weren’t making fun of gay people. The reason it was funny was because Stu said his friends were mature and then they say paging Dr. Faggot. That’s the only reason. They weren’t laughing about putting gay into it. And faggot is a common word people use to make fun of people, not necessarily saying your gay. Geez.
What I have to say about the whole “Paging Dr. Faggot” deal is that the reason why the movie doesn’t say “Paging Dr. N*gger” is because blacks were called niggers during slavery you idiot. That’s way more sensitive than being called a “faggot”, and besides “faggot” actually means a bundle of sticks. So stop being so sensitive. Yes it’s a negative connotation for homosexuals but get over. The world is still going round so just leave it alone. If you really don’t like it that much then ignore it.
The Dr.Faggot thing isn’t a big deal, they said one thing that you don’t like, get over it?
Movies are always, racist, sexist, or homophobic.
Like the movie was funny, so whocares
You are litterally too stupid to insult.
Thank you.
Mr.chow- ok i forgive you. . . right afterr you suckk on these chineese nutts!
I love how everyone is making a huge deal about one or two things that are offensive…but if no one noticed..that whold movie is offensive..but its funny so no one should care.
besides that point my favorite quote would be when alan gives his speech..
ok lissen dipshits its so long gay boys not see you later you made me loose a fuckim bet!!!!!!!!!! fix the shit!!
-fat shit landon!
these are terrible…there are some much funnier ones in the movie and you didnt even get all of em right…half of em are misquoted because you said the wrong person said it or u said they said the wrong thing…plus you didnt even finish some of the convo-quotes…get it right.
Whats the quote that Mr. Chow says something like “we’ll mess all you motherfukers up and we take it?
The 4th of the top 10 is hella wrong Mr. Chow actually says “So long gay boys!!” not “see you later gay boys” watch the movie more motherfuckerrrrrrrrr!!!
Alicia he actually says “Now give me Money or I’ll shot him and I’ll shot all you mothafuckers and then then will take it. Your choice bitches!!”
Stu Price: (singing and playin piano) What do tigers dream of when they take their little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras, or Halle Berry in her Catwoman suit? Don’t you worry your pretty striped head, we’re gonna get you back to Tyson and your cozy tiger bed. And then we’re gonna find our best friend Doug, and then we’re gonna give him a best friend hug. Doug, Doug, oh, Doug, Dougie, Dougie, Doug, Doug! But if he’s been murdered by crystal meth tweakers, well then we’re s**t out of luck
Mr. Chow: “Now give me Money or I’ll shoot him and I’ll shoot all you mothafuckers and then then will take it. Your choice bitches!!”
hahahhahahhahahahahahhaha, me favorite parts ever. xD
Mr. Chow:”I want my purse BACK!!” Alan:”Its now a purse is a satchel!” Mr. Chow:”Its a purse!! KAY!! And you steal from wrong guy”
Just thought everyone should remember Carlos and his baby weinace! That was the best!
you guys are idiots, this is clearly meant for people with a sense of humor to see. if your offended by this in the first place, THEN WHYD YOU FRIGGIN LOOK IT UP IN THE FIRST PLACE.?
retards.
Dear strange internet people.
Please realize no-one is actually offended. You just want them to be. That way you can have something to rant on about. Besides. He’s american. American people get offended about stuff that doesn’t have anything to do with them. Constantly.
From Josh.
ps- if you don’t like being treated as so called “second class” citizens in “this country” then i guess you shouldn’t be a homo or you should move to a different country <<< Jmad you are hilarious.
nope, doctor cracker would have been funny too. the other one, well that just doesn’t make sense.
they say fat Jesus and you dont see people freaking out about that.They make fun of everyone in the movie. Get over it!
you can’t expect people to accept homosexuality instantly or at all. You have to respect peoples’ beliefs. You think everyone is against you. Look at Christians.I am one and people dont respect me all the time when I tell them what I believe.
It;s a good movie, thats it. If you dont like it, dont watch it!
Whats the part at the end where alan says something like…
If i dont do that then whey did i do it.. RIDDLE ME THAT…
lol
How does it go?
haha have you noticed that adam hasnt said anything since you guys were ripping him out whata sud guy lol smoke some weed and have a drink man then youll be sweet its 10 times funnyer when you watch the movie stoned i just cracked up!
gay people do nothing but seek attention, instead of watching and enjoying a good movie they have to stand up and speak about gayness, its unnatural and You can answer to god for what your doing or forever burn in hell with all your gay buddies
Two guys made comments on here a YEAR ago and people are still insulting them? How do you idiots justify this?
Todolo motherfucker!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111
stop jacking your weenus little carlos!!
not at the table carlos.
How dare you she’s a nice lady
In the face, in the face!!!
Ive seeen the movie so many times and i dont think i will ever get sick of it! <3
She's wearing my grandmothers holocaust ring!
They gave out rings at the holocaust??
so long gay boyz!
IT'S funny beicause hes fat!